the journey continues…

“You can’t change the world and you do not have any rights to interfere in other’s life” Period.
My mom says this to me almost every day but I don’t agree.I certainly believe that we can change the world and we can interfere in other’s life if it is for a good cause.

When ever I meet people if they are close relatives or friends I always make it a point to correct their mistakes which my mom doesn’t like.She says you are nobody to correct them.According to her every human is born with some characteristics that we can’t change.By pointing-out their mistakes we might loose them because obviously no one is going to like when you say something bad about them.I agree to her point that no one is ready to accept changes so fast or accept their mistakes in front as we are not gods.But still we need to tell them that “Dude what are you doing is not correct.You are not supposed to behave this way” .That moment they might get offended.But later they might also think on that and might try to correct themselves.I have come across many people like that.Initially they got offended with me but later they silently called/mailed me to say that I was correct and its nice to have me in their close circles.I believe that makes any relationships stronger and more closer.

One of our dear friend is very good for all of us.He is really good from heart and in office or outside anywhere he can’t be bad to others.That’s his nature.He can’t yell at his boss when something goes wrong in office which was not his fault,he can’t yell at his colleagues etc etc.He can’t be a bad boy to anyone outside except his family.There his original character comes in to play.All the frustration that he can’t show outside he shows at his family.His wife and his aged parents are target for this.Damn…His family thinks its good if he comes late to home and its really good if he has work in weekends also!!. See whats happens? His own family is slowly moving away from him and he is not realizing it! His bonding with his parents/wife are becoming loose day by day.

Let’s take another person whom I met.She is one among my close friends.She was OK till she got married.After marriage she is very much possessive about her husband.She won’t allow him to go with his friends.No outings for him with company colleagues.He can’t speak in cellphone more than 15 min to anyone.She loves him and takes care of him very much.But there is no free-air between them.I feel he is getting suffocated by her over love or concern which is not healthy.
Both husband/wife have grown 25-30 years and over a period of time they would have made their own friends ,relatives in the society which is very normal.Obviously priorities will change after marriage but he/she can not cut down those contacts completely.One should be smart enough to understand and respect each other’s privacy.Love doesn’t mean controlling each other its all about sharing with each other ….Right?

Immature elders ?? People are supposed to get matured with age.But I have seen many elders who behave very immaturely and easily hurting their kids.When people get old,they get this unsecured feeling.They think that son is not listening to them..he is not taking care of them…they will start finding small small mistakes,show displeasure,complaining about daughter-in-law …finally ending up with the breaking up of the entire family.I have seen this in most of the families.I agree that there would be always generation gap between them but it doesn’t mean that new generation doesn’t want old people.
Every son remembers that how his dad ironed his uniforms, how he dropped him to the school everyday, how mom took care of him when he was sick etc etc.No one can take away those memories from him and every son/daughter wants to give all those nice moments to his parents also.Most of the ladies never allow their daughter-in-laws to cook as they think if they give up the kitchen they will loose their power.Whole life they are happy spend time in kitchen rather than doing anything else!!.
I believe new generation is much more matured.They might not be good in old traditions and customs but they are good in thinking/tackling people.They are much more open-minded and they can run a better/good family compared their fathers.Its time for this old generation to leave their unnecessary self-pride and add their experience in making a nice happy family.

Early morning my cell started beeping with messages…Happy Woman’s Day! !
I don’t give much importance to any of these days as long as it really has a genuine reason to celebrate. Womans’s day is yet another day for me…
I remember my granny, who was a woman with a strong will. My grand-pa passed away in his early ages, so my granny was the one who took care of the entire family.4 daughters, an unmarried sister and a son, their education,marriage etc. She had a tough time. But her attitude towards life was very positive, she never thought of running away from her responsibilities, She had this strong will power which made her to face any problem in life.I had hardly seen her crying or cribbing for anything. In her 60’s she had climbed the Tirupati Hills 3 times… Can you believe that?

GrandPa and GrandMa,Wedding Photo

Her father was in army, so naturally she had discipline in her blood.Cooking,cleaning any work she was the perfectionist.She had a great enthusiasm towards life till her last days. I remember her saying, when she was on hospital bed that she didn’t put Mango Pickle that year, because she didn’t get good mangoes.Living life till the last moment right?
I wished Mom for Woman’s day.She replied reluctantly “what’s special in that? It’s just a another day in my life..”. My mom who is a double graduate always feels little inferior because she is not working like other women and is housewife. But I always tell her that she should be proud of herself because today we are all in good positions and well cultured because of her. Not only us,she was there for everybody in our big family. Most of my cousins studied in our house , many kids grew up in our house I remember during summer vacations our house used to be a small day care center!!.All these things would not have been happened if she was working!!
My mother-in-law celebrates Woman’s Day in her office. All women in her office buy new sarees and they go for a lunch in a nice restaurant.I have seen my mom-in-law waiting for this d-day from many months.That day she feels very proud of herself and it’s a honor for to celebrate Womans’s day.My mom-in-law, even though she has not studied much,she can easily mingle with anyone.She is not shy or hesitated compared to my mom who always feel nervous to speak in public.Working outside,meeting people and mainly financial independence makes you confident and extrovert in life. I feel good about her because she is doing what she wants to do in life and she is happy about it.
Other women who comes to my mind are my maids.The maid in my hometown, who lost her husband when she was 30 and now she is 60 still working in many houses. Every month,first week,she will be waiting for the postman ,who gives her 300Rs as Widow Pension.She has to pay 10rs to that postman as bribe otherwise he will not give that money to her!!.
My maid here in Bangalore,her husband drinks and fritters away all the money.She will work in 2-3 houses apart from that does a job in school as sweeper.One day I gave my old bangles,rings to her she said she doesn’t wear all those [even though she is interested].When her husband was not well, she has prayed somewhere [probably a church] and she is not wearing bangles,rings,bindi nothing.
So that makes Indian women really special someway !! Isn’t it??.